It would seem
they have been putting something in the water at the Beehive because an awful
lot of the b’s are having trouble with their tiny insectivore memory banks.
Banks’ blanks
We are currently
all watching with increasing alarm the ridiculous spectacle of Banksia who it
would seem is unable to recall flying in a flash private helicopter to a
multi-million dollar home on the North Shore of Auckland where he dined with a
man so large he darks out the sun. Banksia’s recall is also compromised whenever
he is asked where all his election funds came from or whether he paid full
price for his holiday accommodation. It would appear he also has forgotten the
rest of us have not just arrived on a cabbage boat (whatever the fuck one of
those is).
When it comes to
a question of what Jianqi should do about Banksia, then politics aside it is
obvious this man won’t remember what he has just voted for in the chamber ten
minutes afterwards. This calls into question his ability to remember what he is
being paid $217,000p.a. to do
Key blanks
As for Jianqi it
is obvious he is also experiencing the first stages of memory loss. It is clear
there are big blanks in his recall. For example he doesn’t seem to recall how he
told Hell-On-Wheels that she should stand Whinny down when he was being
investigated over alleged electoral expense issues. “That’s what a good Prime
Minister would do – that’s what I would do” he lisped. So if he believed that he
is then by his own definition either not a good Prime Minister, unless of
course he is a liar or has simply forgotten.
Jianqi also
seems to have forgotten he didn’t actually win the election with an
earth-shattering majority. In fact he seems to have forgotten he didn’t win it
with any sort of complete majority. While it is true he got more seats and more
votes than any other single party, in both instances that still only amounted
to less than half of the votes cast.
Finally little
Jianqi seems to have forgotten he is no longer a Lone Ranger currency trader
who can zoom here and there at someone else’s expense and cut deals of his own.
Brown outs
Another who
seems to be having trouble with his short-term memory is Gezza Brown Eye. We
already suspected Gez’s stomach had no memory and now we find the problem is
not confined to that. Gezza has had a lot of trouble over the last year
remembering to move his big foot from his mouth before trying to say something
clever. So far he has referred to Bob Parkup as a clown (which is accurate
though Gez himself only needs the funny shoes and the wig to be a much better
candidate for that epithet.
Gez’s
clodhoppers were still wedged in his gob a few months later when he decided to
regale us all with his up-to date knowledge of life in Finland. Unfortunately
it would seem Gezza’s knowledge of Finland was written on the back of a postage
stamp in crayon and did not include the warning “remove hoof before you make a
goof”. Consequently he became the very large butt of some very good Finnish
humour.
That last gaffe
should have Finnished (I couldn’t resist that) him off, but Ol Brown Eye still
had blank to fire. About ten days ago he was asked about some comments from Christchurch
City Councillor Yani Johansson but was unable to say much except that he didn’t
know who Mr Johansson was. Given Gez was liaising with said Council and has
been regularly since the shaky city shook itself to the ground, you might think
he would remember this dude. Maybe the Scandinavian name confused him and he
thought it was another fin trying to make a mockery of him.
No benefit of hindsight
Another NewCon
who appears to be having trouble with memory is Benefit Minister Paula Bumfat.
As a former solo mother who had to bring up kids and get herself an education
you might think she would remember very well what a hard row to hoe that is.
However it is
abundantly clear to this observer that Ms Bumfat has almost no recollection of those
days. If it were not so, then why would she seem to think the rules should be
changed for the latest batch of solos ensuring none of them get the
opportunities she did at our expense. Nobody who could remember bringing up a
child alone while trying to get a career under way could ever see the logic in reducing student allowances
for those who need the assistance of those benefits in order to become a
self-supporting and worthwhile member of society.
Lest we forget
Another and
possibly even more costly event involving memory also came to my attention this
week. It has been revealed that Crown lawyers and others were aware when they authorised
police to seize assets belonging to Kim Dotcom their paperwork was flawed and
the seizures were illegal. This was discovered at the time and even
Solicitor-General David Collins knew of it, yet they all chose to ignore this fact
and go ahead anyway.
So what did this have
to do with memory? Simply this; Justice Potter has already pointed out to KD
that he has the right to sue over the Crown’s actions. Given he probably has
more money than the NZ Government they must have forgotten you don’t piss off
big wealthy men who can sue your arse on a scale you have only ever seen in
your nightmares
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