Friday, 20 May 2011

Time out in our time

I don’t really know why I’m writing this because apparently the world is due to end on Sunday morning at 11am our time.

Religious nutcase Harold Camping has widely predicted the end to be at this time – so it must be right, eh? He is actually saying it will be 6pm on Saturday 21 May, but you have take account of the fact he is talking Eastern Standard Time which is 17 hours behind us. Why God chose EST I don’t know, but it means if this ding-dong is right, then he is also wrong, because in New Zealand we will get to see not only the last six hours of May 21 which the Yanks won’t, but also the first 11 hours of the 22nd.  Unless of course God staggers the whole thing so we all get it at 6pm OUR time.

Actually old Campervan has had a previous crack at this soothsaying business and I have to say it didn’t work out that well. Here we are 17 years later all still in one piece despite his strong assertions the world was ending in September 1994.

But what is wrong with an old octogenarian sharing such ‘insights’ with the world. It all seems pretty harmless, really. Well, actually it isn’t, entirely. For one thing this old fart has involved God in the game and I really don’t think he got official permission for that (from the big fella).

I know why he did it, of course. It’s so that when it all goes wrong again he has someone else to blame. “God told me, so it’s his fault.”

The trouble is that nutcases like this prey upon the feeble minded and the gullible and I gather some credulous cretins have divested themselves of most of their worldly goods on the basis that they won’t be much use to them next week.  I notice the crazy old bastard is not getting rid of his money. For some bizarre reason when asked about this he has a brief visitation from the Gods of logic and said, “What’s the point – It will be the end of the world”.  The cynic inside me wonders if those divesting themselves of their cash bought any products marketed by Mr Camp Stretcher or made donations to some phoney fund he has set up.

I have heard rumours of people talking about euthanizing their children to save them the horror of the finale ‘rapture’. Sounds a bit like Jimmy Jones Jones Jones and his soul soul clones to me.

I think somebody should take Mr Pup Tent in hand and cart him away to a secluded hilltop where he can sit and drool away the rest of his life waiting for his final judgement.

I see he believes the Bible not only to be ‘the word of God’ but also to have been actually written by Louis himself. Or as ol’ Guy Ropes would have it, “every word was written right from the lips of God.”

This seems bizarre to me. I know they probably didn’t have computers or pens when the world began, but I doubt very much that God wrote the Bible in drool. On the other hand......

However I guess I’d better put my affairs in order just in case Mr Campylobacter is right. Oh sod it all who cares? Even if he is right who the hell will know?

See you on the other side.

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